10 Ways to Support a Friend Having Surgery (11 Recipes Included!)

There’s nothing like surgery to make you appreciate the value of friends, and of a supportive partner.

I recently had a knee replacement (read about the equipment/accessories/clothing to have on hand for such a surgery here), and the first few weeks were made SO much easier due to the support of our friends and family.  My husband John was a terrific Florence Nightingale, filling my ice machine, bringing me food, doing laundry, and basically running the household seamlessly.

In addition to his hard work, we really, really benefited from our friends’ support during the first couple of weeks. The number of people who brought us meals, stopped by to say hi with some flowers or frozen yogurt, picked up groceries, or even my meds when it was tough for John to get to the store/pharmacy – it blew us away, made us feel loved, and made all the difference.

Friends want to help, but what’s the best way to do so?  Based on my recent experience, I have some thoughts to share.

Overall:
Everyone wants to help but isn’t sure what’s needed, so they kindly ask what they can do. However, instead of saying ‘Let me know if I can do anything for you’, just go ahead and do something. People are so kind to ask what you need, but most of us aren’t going to feel comfortable saying, ‘Actually, if you could bring us lunch tomorrow, that’d be great.’   So instead of a general offer for help, consider saying, ‘I’m planning to drop by dinner for you on Tuesday, so you can use it now or freeze it for later. Let me know if you have any allergies I should know about.” or “I’m headed to Trader Joe’s right now and will pick up some basics and some healthy snacks for you to have on hand that I’ll leave on your doorstep in an hour or so. If you need anything in particular, let me know.” or “I’d love to take you to your first PT appointments until you’re able to drive. Let me know when they are.”  For most of us, a concrete offer is much easier to accept than a general ‘I’m here if you need me.’

Below is a list of specific items/actions that are particularly helpful to give someone after knee surgery:

1. Food/Meals. I didn’t step foot in the kitchen for two weeks after surgery. And I was in a total fog the first 7-10 days. John was working full-time and caring for me, so grocery shopping and cooking was not high on his agenda.  So, healthy food was a wonderful gift that so many of our friends provided. Soups, a smoothie, a salad, or a full meal – anything and everything is greatly appreciated, whether it was homemade or not! Additionally, the meals that arrived in the second week, when I was still unable to cook and had more of an appitite, were really great as well. John was sad when the meals ended :)!  One friend made mini-muffins specifically designed to be eaten with meds that had to be taken ‘with food’. I kept a baggie of them with my pills, which was great. And food that can be frozen for later is also great. Recipies for some of the items are at the end of the blog!

   

2. A Crossbody Pouch:.  If they don’t already have a small crossbody to carry items like their phone around the house hands-free while using a walker, it’s a great item to give.

   

3. Uber Gift Card: I received a nice Uber gift card that can be used for meals or for rides to doctors’ appointments/PT before I’m able to drive. Super useful! (If you’re a Costco member, check online as they sometimes offer $100 Uber gift cards for $80).

   

4. Massage: Offer a hand, shoulder, or foot massage while visiting, or gift a gift card for one! Your body is feeling pretty beat up after surgery and after sleeping in odd positions for multiple days/weeks, and this would be a terrific gift.

   

5. Pre-Surgery Pedicure: Take her out a day or two before the surgery for a fresh pedicure so she can go into this whole procedure with nice toes and feeling good! It’ll be many weeks before she can go treat herself to a pedicure again!

   

6. Acts of Service: If they have a dog, tell them which days you can help walk them. If there are other services they can’t/don’t have time to do (mowing the lawn, grocery shopping etc) offer to help with that.

   

7. Leg Cover for Shower.: This item is a game-changer! If they don’t already have the ‘cast cover bag’ for covering their leg incision while showering, get it for them! My doctor didn’t tell me about it – I just found it online – and it was awesome.  Super useful!!!

   

8. Flowers are always appreciated!

   

9. Hot Water Bottle: Most people don’t have a hot water bottle, and it would be a great gift. I used mine a ton the first few weeks to help a sore back and just to feel warm and cozy when continually icing or just resting. This ‘sweater’ one is nice, and I love my ‘furry’ version.

   

10. New PJs:  You spend your first couple of weeks post-surgery in lightweight, soft, cozy pants/pjs, and a new pair of pjs would be a great individual or group gift!

And finally….just pop by for a quick check-in! A friendly face is always welcome, and if they aren’t up for a visit, then hopefully they’ll let you know. When friends dropped by after dinner for a visit with frozen yogurts in hand, it was perfect.  One good friend came by every day for the first week or so for a quick 10-minute check-in (and would fill my ice machine as well during the visit), and it was greatly appreciated (but only do that if you’re a really good friend of the patient, and if you won’t have your feelings hurt if they aren’t up for a visit!).

Recipes of Meals/Items Friends Dropped Off!

The following recipes are provided:  #1-8 are written out below, and #9-11 are linked.

1. Kale and Red Cabbage Salad (served with the basil lime chicken, below)
2. Basil Lime Chicken
3. Buddah Salmon Bowl
4. Pasta Rustica
5. Vegetable Cheese Quiche
6. Coconut Carrot Ginger Soup
7. Cold Cucumber Soup
8. No Sugar Muffins
9. Pumpkin Maple Muffins
10. 6 Ingredient Creamy Roasted Tomato Soup
11. Gemma’s Best Chocolate Chip Cookie Recipe

1. Kale and Red Cabbage Salad:

Ingredients

• 2 bunches curly green kale or lacinato kale or a combo, chopped and stemmed.
• ½ cup shredded parmesan cheese
• Whole wheat breadcrumbs
• ½ – 1 cup chopped red cabbage (adds great crunch!)
• ½ cup cubed avocado
• ½ cup cherry tomatoes, halved
• Hard boiled eggs, optional
• Salted pepitas (or any nut of choice)

Dressing

• ½ cup extra virgin olive oil
• ¼ cup fresh squeezed lemon juice
• 2-3 cloves garlic, pressed
• ½ teaspoon salt
• Pinch red pepper flakes (optional)

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Directions

1. In a large salad bowl, toss kale with a generous drizzle of olive oil and a sprinkle of salt.  Massage briefly with hands to coat the kale.  Let sit while you prepare the rest of the ingredients.  The key to cutting the bitterness of kale is to let it sit for 10 – 15 minutes coated in olive oil.   
2. Make the dressing by combining all ingredients in a glass jar.  Shake to combine.  If you don’t use all the dressing, then it keeps in the jar on the counter or in the fridge for a couple of weeks. Can also mix dressing in small bowl or Pyrex.  Whisk to combine.
3. Chop and prepare remaining ingredients for the salad: cabbage, avocado, tomato and whatever else you’d like to add.
4. Add breadcrumbs to kale and mix to combine.
5. Add all other ingredients to the salad bowl.  Add dressing to your liking (you don’t have to use all of it).  Top with shredded parmesan and pepitas.  Toss to combine.

Tips:  Using prechopped, stemless kale can save time.  Breadcrumbs are not mandatory, but they do add a nice texture.  Any breadcrumbs will do.

2. Basil Lime Chicken

Ingredients

• 4 Limes (juice and zest) divided
• 3 T olive oil
• 1/4 cup extra virgin olive oil (I don’t use this much…I eyeball it)
• 3 T dijon mustard
• 3 T worcestershire Sauce
• 3 T soy sauce
• 6 green onions chopped, divided
• 4 cloves garlic minced, divided
• 1/4 cup chopped Basil
• Salt and pepper to taste
• 3 lbs chicken breasts
• 1 jalapeno, diced

Instructions:

• Combine the zest and juice of 2 limes, olive oil, mustard, Worcestershire, soy, 3 onions, 2 garlic cloves, salt and pepper, and mix well.
• Cut chicken into even cutlets and place in a gallon-sized baggie.
• Pour marinade over the chicken and marinate for 2+ hours (I marinate overnight)
• Preheat grill or grill pan
• Place chicken on the grill and grill for 7 minutes.
• Then flip and cook until the internal temp reaches 170.
• Remove from the grill and let the chicken rest.
• Meanwhile combine juice and zest of 2 lime with extra virgin olive oil, 3 chopped onions, 2 minced garlic cloves, jalapeno, and basil.
• Slice chicken into bite-sized pieces and pour sauce over top.

Note: It is even better as leftovers the next day – slice the leftover chicken, let it marinate in the sauce overnight.

3. Buddah Salmon Bowl

Ingredients

• ½  cup white miso
• ¼  cup unseasoned rice vinegar
• 2 tablespoons grated fresh ginger
• 2 teaspoons honey
• 1 tablespoon toasted sesame oil
• 1 teaspoon grated garlic
• 1 ib. salmon, skin and pin bones removed, cut into 1 inch cubes
• 1 cup uncooked black rice, rinsed
• 1 can lowfat coconut milk
• Kosher salt
• Olive oil for drizzling
• 1 pound butternut squash, peeled and cut into ½-inch dice and roasted
• 1 cup edamame, sliced scallions, red cabbage shredded (handful per person)
• Toasted sesame seeds (optional), sliced avocado, shelled edamame, sliced scallions, sriracha for serving.

Directions:

Prepare the Rice

Cook rice per instructions on the package, substituting 1 can of coconut milk for the water.

Make Marinade

In a small bowl, whisk the miso, rice vinegar, ginger, honey, sesame oil, and garlic to form a paste. Transfer ¼ cup of the mixture to a small bowl and reserve for the fish. Whisk in 1/4 tablespoons of water into the remaining mixture to form a pourable dressing.

Prepare the Fish

Pat fish dry and evenly coat with the reserved miso paste. Refrigerate while preparing the rice and root vegetables; up to an hour. For best results, cook the salmon in an air fryer at 400°F for 8 minutes, turning it after 4 minutes.

Finish and Serve

Brush the fish with some of the ginger-miso dressing and sprinkle with sesame seeds. Divide the rice, squash between 2 bowls. Add avocado, shelled edamame, and scallions. Add the salmon to the bowls, and drizzle with the remaining dressing over all; especially on the red cabbage.

4. Pasta Rustica:

Ingredients:
4 links Italian Sausage
4 T olive oil
1.5 C chopped onion
1 tsp minced garlic
3 28-oz cans Italian plum tomatoes, drained
2 tsp dried basil or Italian seasoning
1 tsp crushed red pepper
2 cups chicken broth

1 lb penne or rigatoni
8-12 oz cubed Havarti cheese
1.3 Cup Kalmata olives, pitted
1.4 C chipped fresh basil

Instructions:
Heat 2 tablespoons oil in pot. Remove sausage meat from casing and break into bite-sized chunks with a wooden spoon and brown in olive oil until cooked. Remove from pan, drain fat.

Heat the other 2 tablespoons of oil in the same pot. Saute onions and garlic until translucent, about 5 mins. Chop tomatoes in their can be sticking kitchen shears in the can and cutting til they are smaller. Put tomatoes, dried basil, and crushed pepper into the pot and bring to a boil.  Continue breaking up the tomatoes with the back of the spoon. Add broth and bring to a boil. Reduce heat to medium and simmer til it thickens to a chunky sauce – about 40 minutes. Return sausage to pot. (This can be done ahead, just reheat sauce when you are ready to use.)

Preheat oven to 375. Cook pasta in a large pot of boiling salted water til tender but firm. Drain well. Return pasta to the pot. Pour the sauce over the pasta nd add cubed cheese. Transfer pasta to a 9 x 13 casserole dish. Sprinkle with olives (if desired). Bake until heated through, about 30 minutes. Top with fresh basil. Serves 8.

5. Vegetable Cheese Quiche

Ingredients:
Pre-made crust
Sautéed leeks
Broccoli chopped fine lightly steamed (you can swap out for other veggies as desired such as onions, mushrooms, spinach etc)
Cheeses – cheddar, Swiss, Gruyère
8 Eggs whisked
A little full cream
Salt and pepper to taste

Instructions:
Combine all ingredients, pour into the pie crust, and bake at 350°F until golden brown, about 1 hour.

Can be frozen for use as needed. Cut the amount needed and reheat.

6. Coconut Carrot Ginger Soup

Prep Time: 15 min | Cook Time: 25 mins | Servings: Yield: 4

Ingredients:
3 TBS salted butter
3 TBS coconut oil
1 medium white onion, diced
3 TBS freshly grated ginger
1 tsp freshly grated turmeric
3/4 tsp cumin
3/4 tsp coriander
2 lbs. carrots (approx. 7 large carrots), peeled & chopped
3 cups vegetable stock
1 cup canned full-fat coconut milk
salt and pepper to taste

Directions:
Sauté the onions in butter and oil to bring out their flavor.
After a few minutes, add the carrot and ginger and give it a good mix.
After the carrots, onion, garlic and ginger are smelling all wonderful and delicious, you can add the other spices.
I used cumin and coriander which work nicely with the coconut milk. For an alternative, you could do curry powder and turmeric or even a little pinch of cinnamon. You can add a pinch of salt and pepper too at this point, if you like.
After that cooks for another minute or two, add the coconut milk and vegetable broth, give it a good stir and let it simmer away until the carrots are tender. This should take about 20 minutes.
Now it’s time to blend! You can use an immersion blender in the pot which will work just fine but for the smoothest results, I’d recommend using a Vitamix or other high-speed blender.
Carefully transfer the soup to a blender and blend in batches until smooth. Just be sure to allow the steam to escape as you blend by cracking the lid.

HOW TO STORE
Fridge: Let cool then store in a sealed container for up to 4 days.
Freezer: Let cool then store in a sealed container for up to 3 months.
Reheating: Reheat stovetop or in the microwave, adding a bit of water or broth to thin if needed. If frozen, thaw overnight in the fridge before reheating.

7. Cold Cucumber Soup:
Prep Time: 10 mins  | Servings: Serves 8 Ingredients:

6 Persian cucumbers, thinly sliced, reserve a few slices for garnish
1½ cups plain whole milk Greek yogurt
¾ cup fresh basil
¼ cup extra-virgin olive oil, more for drizzling
3 tablespoons fresh lemon juice
2 tablespoons fresh dill
1 garlic clove
¾ teaspoon sea salt
½ teaspoon honey
Freshly ground black pepper
Fresh mint, dill, or chives, for garnish

Directions:
In a blender, combine the cucumbers, yogurt, basil, olive oil, lemon juice, dill, garlic, salt, honey, and several grinds of pepper and blend until smooth. Chill for at least 4 hours.
Serve in bowls and garnish with the reserved cucumber slices, fresh herbs, drizzles of olive oil, and freshly ground black pepper.

8. No Sugar Muffins

Ingredients:
2 C almond meal
1 C old-fashioned rolled oats
1/2 C chopped walnuts
1/2 C currants or raisins, optional
2 tsp ground cinnamon
1/2 tsp ground nutmeg
1 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp fine sea salt
3 eggs, beaten
1 C grated zucchini (about 1 zucchini)
1 C grated carrot (about 1 carrots)
6 tablespoons unsalted butter, melted
1/2 C Grade B maple syrup
1 tsp vanilla
paper muffin cups

Instructions:
Combine ingredients, pour into paper muffin cups in a muffin tin, and bake for about 25 minutes at 350 degrees.

9. Pumpkin Maple Muffins

10. 6 Ingredient Creamy Roasted Tomato Soup

11. Gemma’s Best Chocolate Chip Cookie Recipe